MLB and NFL collide

My favorite part about mid-August is the striking dissemblance between pennant race baseball and preseason football. I've spent the last 4 ½ months completely absorbed in the MLB landscape (with minor hiccups being the Bulls playoff run, Shark Week and the twelve hours I boycotted the Cubs after they fell to 22-31 on June 2nd) to the point where I'm lost without at least 10 minutes of boxscore perusal a day. My brain is all queued up with baseball knowledge just waiting for the appropriate conversation "in" so I can release my thoughts on topics such as why Sweet Lou left Clifford Floyd in to bat with RISP during the late innings of a recent game against a lefty pitcher with nobody warming up in the pen, then subbed Matt Murton in defensively for Floyd the very next inning anyway. Cliff has an .285 OBP against lefties over the last 3 years compared to Matty’s robust .404 OBP (not to mention a .916 OPS) against southpaws. I usually bring these thoughts up in front of attractive women who I've just met, so as to remove even the infinitesimal chance of me seeing them naked.

At this point, the crack of the bat is therapeutic with every shot in the gap representing a step closer (possibly) to playoff greatness. The psychology of an early advantage is now recognized and acknowledged with the proper perspective, aided by a vast catalogue of data on how each team augments, keeps or (in the Brewers case) painfully forfeits a lead. For every fan who still has a team in the ring with a punchers chance, September baseball looms large...

...But wait. Madden 08 is hitting stores tomorrow... and... brace yourself... they've tweaked it slightly and made some minor changes... which appear to... IMPROVE ON LAST YEAR'S VERSION!?!?! Wait a second, is that... is that John Facenda I hear in the distance? Holy crap, the NFL preseason is here! Please excuse my sloppy laughter, I'm eternally giddy right now at the possibilities. This is all too much for me right now... Is it O.K. if I break down in tears when those NFC Champion Bears take the field? Now you're telling me there's more? Fantasy football drafts for the next three weekends? Fine, I'm doing a manual shutdown of my brain. I can't juggle my love for NL Central drama with the NFC Norris reset to all square. It's like simultaneously starting your favorite book while watching the final thirty minutes of your favorite movie (only for some reason you have selective amnesia and you aren’t aware of the greatness of either yet).

On second thought, what the hell:

The Cubbies bats have recently become ice cold (with the exceptions of Jacque Jones, Jason Kendall, Matt Murton and Mark DeRosa) and key injuries (Soriano and Ramirez) are slowing the offensive surge that was the cornerstone of the successful two previous months. Our starters have a combined 5.86 ERA for the month of August and our "closer" has given up 5 ER in his last 6 IP. All this being said, I'm not worried. We're only a 1 ½ behind the first place Brewers despite playing hapless baseball the last 10 days. Baseball is cyclical, after all, and for that reason I see both teams (the Brewers and Cubs) priming themselves for a furious finish. Shitty baseball happens. The character of a strong team endures.

The Bears look (on paper) like a much improved offensive team. Greg Olson will be a top flight tight end for the next ten years. Benson is a strong, tough-nosed runner with depth behind him (Adrian Peterson and Garrett Wolfe, trust me on this one) and a chip on his shoulder. Muhsin Mohammed, Bernard Berrian, Mark Bradley and Rasheed Davis make up a receiving crops that had the lowest percentage of dropped passes in the entire NFL last year. An experienced O-line that has played together for a few seasons, anchored by 5-time Pro Bowl Center Olin Kreutz. For good measure, we'll have Devin Hester running around causing havoc... and we have a quarterback as well... a couple of them, I think. Mix that in with another stingy defense and even with a tough schedule I could see another January game in Soldier Field this year.

At this point, I’m exceedingly optimistic. I'm just waiting for Ben to rain on my parade with his "Prince Fielder/Brett Favre underdogs of greatness" rant in which he bashes Chicago sports fans for being self-important on a level that rivals Bostonians in their obnoxiousness. But because I shudder at the thought of Chris Farley being compared to Jimmy Fallon on any level, I'm going to move on. It only seems logical that with the sports world at the apex of events right now that I'm venturing east this Friday for a long weekend in Hoboken with my esteemed colleague, Benny C. The roughly 57 hours I'll be there will be spent having multiple sessions of Madden 2008, EPL games with Irish breakfasts, Father/Son-like Folgers moments "having a catch", a fantasy football draft and, of course, NHL 94 on Genesis. If Ben still has a girlfriend after she witnesses this condensed version of "UVA Ben and AK" replete with malt liquor and bum wine, then she gets my complete and encompassing respect and blessing.

92 hours and counting...