Enter the Liverbird

This upcoming Saturday marks the one-year anniversary of “The Bowler and Benny” and it only seems appropriate that our first post was entitled Matt Hasselbeck and the Hawks: Assclowns on Parade. It appears that we’ve come full circle: 12 months, 58 posts and those pesky Seahawks and their incorrigible fans still are atop our shit list. Last year they limped out of Soldier Field in the Divisional Round after a hard fought and heartbreaking loss to the Bears. This year, they are up against (in my humble opinion) even bigger odds when they once again take their show on the road to Green Bay to assail their demons from playoffs past. We are familiar with Benny’s fractured take on Mike Holmgren, but this return engagement has got to have my esteemed colleague reexamining this old issue in a new light - from exalted head coach, to greedy egoist, to football pariah, to bad penny all in the span of ten years… The mind reels. Anyway, I’ll leave Ben to the breakdown since his team will be in the ring this weekend.

I would like to take this opportunity to introduce the newest member and welcome addition to this blog… Ladies and Gentlemen, our new Footy Correspondent, Mr. Kurt Bauer aka Dirty McLiverbird. Kurt and I attended Loyola Academy together and share some common interests highlighted by (but not limited to) Mel Brooks movies, bum wine at dawn and “taking the day off”. He also played four years of soccer in high school before destroying his knee and turning to less endurance related pursuits (such as yelling at TV during sporting events and sporadically breaking out into soccer songs). He’s the reason I am a Liverpool fan and there is nary a soul who knows more about the Premiership than this man. We’ve brought him on this January, a time when player transfers are made and stretch runs are contemplated, to add some much needed depth to our English football coverage. So like a super-sub of Ryan Babel-esque proportions, El Dirty is here for the betterment of this page… and it’s not a moment too soon.

I would say “this picture doesn’t do him justice”, but that’s not true. At all. The picture is spot on. This is the teasipper who is going to write about Footy. Hide the children.